The Power of Words

I wrote a comment on LinkedIn today. I was viewing a post and wanted to support the article.

I only leave comments if I have something to contribute to the conversation, and debate was encouraged.

I made a comment on the topic of ghosting in the context of employers not providing feedback for unsuccessful job applicants. I said,

Ghosting someone can be incredibly damaging. While it is their responsibility to pick themselves up from their failures, it is your responsibility to give feedback from your position of authority, and a failure to do so shows cowardice and ignorance.

I was pleased with my output and believed in my statement. However, I found that after a few hours, the comment came back to me and left me ill at ease. It was the word cowardice.

I included that word to help me process my own frustrations at having recently been ghosted.

By venting in my general comment I somehow managed to expel much of my upset. But in a short time the harshness of my words rattled my energy.

That’s how it is. When we do something that compromises our code, our energy is disrupted. And if we ignore it we invite doubt and negativity.

Words have more power than we know. And the strength of feeling that we give them adds to their impact. All action generates energy: thought, word and deed.

So, I have re-visited my comment and edited it to this.

Ghosting someone can be incredibly damaging. While it is their responsibility to pick themselves up from their failures, it is your responsibility to give feedback from your position of authority, and a failure to do so shows ignorance.

And to this I stand. It may be unintended ignorance, but it is nevertheless the lack of knowledge of the importance of common courtesy, and the responsibility to provide feedback in order to help people develop.

Always offer meaningful feedback to those who ask or deserve it, and choose your words wisely.

To complete this story I should add that I have since found out that the person who ghosted me is having a difficult time and has isolated themselves from many people. It was a sobering reminder to me to always be kind.

My last post was on that very topic.

But it is when we are most challenged that we need to remind ourselves of our own code.

It’s so easy to become self-centred when we are shut out by others.

Yet it is, in my experience, usually someone else’s issue and nothing to do with you.

There are numerous memes on social media offering this idea.

Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about - Be kind. Always.

The complexity of our lifestyle fosters self-doubt. Create your own code, or borrow someone else’s, and remind yourself of it, often.